Tag: Popular Culture & Entertainment

His Beloved Olivia

A tiny puff of wind
covertly breezed into the room
and elicited a little squirm, rhythmed
from beloved Olivia in full bloom

His tempted tongue, quivering
unfurled her moist nether lips in heat
she moaned, her arched hips wriggling
Holy! What a treat!

He thrust inside with pleasure
gently circling her pink pearl, aroused
so sultry was his muse’s gesture
it left him in utter wows

He fondled, kissed and licked her
savouring the juices nectarean
He sucked over and over
revelling in that one moment utopian

The intensity of her sensations heightened
till she pressed herself against her bourgeois
He captured the glow in her face, enlightened
as she finally let out an ecstatic ‘Ahh’

Ingenuity

“Raw ingenuity is very often misconstrued as madness by the crowd. Take no shit. Carry on.”

-The Little Mermaid, MMXVI

It’s your choice!

“In a world which is essentially dualistic in nature, delineated by the two oppugnant forces of good and evil, the little choices that we make everyday, though never easy, chart the kind of life we live in the end.”

-The Little Mermaid, MMXVI

Thought For The Day

“You can buy designer clothing but not elegance. You can shop for pricey make-up but not for beauty. You can purchase an upmarket house but not a home. You can buy expensive education but not manners. You can be a person with deep pockets but with just a shallow existence.”

–The Little Mermaid, MMXVI

Friendship

“Choose your inner circle of friends wisely because stupidity is known to have an intractable contagion effect.”

-The Little Mermaid, MMXVI

21st Century Golden Etiquettes For House Guests

DISCLAIMER

1) This is a general post utterly not calculated to offend anybody; but if the shoe fits, well then lace that bitch up.

2) It is absolutely not aimed at elders for whom our love is rather unconditional.

3) The post has been written in the context of guests staying over for more than 2-3 days and from the point of view of hosts.

Nowadays, the significance of etiquettes for being a thoughtful houseguest is diametrically overlooked. Being a decorous houseguest is, in a nutshell, all about focusing on how to enjoy yourself while being as helpful and unobtrusive as possible. Always remember that hospitality is a gift and therefore you must show a sense of gratitude towards your hosts. If you behave properly, you might even find yourself with the next invitation already up on your way as you are about to leave. Below are some tips that I have tried to outline if you want to be labelled the good, gracious houseguest.

  • 1st Rule: Communicate your plan 

Tell when you’ll be arriving, when you’re leaving and what plans, if any, you might have. This lets hosts organise their own schedules accordingly. Just because you are on a vacation does not mean everyone else is. On a side note, Marianne Moore asserted that, “superior people never make long visits”. Oh well, let’s take that with a pinch of salt maybe?

  • 2nd Rule: Follow house rules

I know I may say ‘make yourself at home’ but I don’t really mean it. So, always ask me where things are and how things work. And please be considerate of the noise you make. Don’t be a prick. Keep your hosts away from your ceaseless jibber-jabber. I am sure you do not want them to remember an ad rem quote from Oscar Wilde, “A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude without providing you company.” Respect dinner time and sleep time; even if you find yourself staring up at a dark ceiling because you’re normally a night owl.

Another thing which breaches my level of tolerance is when guests feel free to offer their leftover food to house pets – be it a dog, a cat or a hippo for that matter. For crying out loud, this is an animal – not a vacuum cleaner to suck up any garbage. It has its own eating pattern (probably better than yours).

Do not forget that a toilet, spelt T-O-I-L-E-T, is a place meant for shitting and not to watch stupid videos or even to contemplate over your miserable life inside for an effing whole one hour. Geez! What do you think? Others will go piss and poop in the open backyard whilst you are too busy basking in the glory of your imagination? Moron! And please, for fuck sake, do not leave your antique pieces of lingerie in the bathroom, even by mistake. Believe you me! No one bothers to admire them twopenny craps.

  • 3rd Rule: Use, do not abuse

I have two types of shampoo in my shower, one very expensive in a tiny bottle and then a big bottle of cheap generic shampoo. Please use the latter. I love you and want you to have the most glorious hair but, this ain’t a hair salon. Be polite and don’t just assume the fancy shit is for you.

I totally understand you might not have brought along your cream, body lotion or any of those stuffs. It’s alright. Here’s mine. But do you know how much it hurts when I see you sprinkling a fuckton of my Givenchy perfume all over your clothes and applying copious dabs of my Biotherm moisturizer everyday on your potato face? Hello, these products cost me an arm and a leg. Kindly have the decency to use them moderately, unless you are replacing those, of course.

Now comes the famous free-rider problem concerning utilities. Psst, you are not staying in a presidential suite of a 7-star hotel where you can unabashedly indulge in all the amenities (civilised people don’t do that even in a hotel though). That said, please have the decorum to ask the adults, and not the children for their WIFI password. And, sorry to disappoint you but I do not celebrate Diwali everyday. So, if you wouldn’t mind, move your fat arse and turn off the lights when you are not using them, would you?

  • 4th Rule: Help around

To put it bluntly, I’m not your mommy. I’m your peer. Just because you are at mine does not mean I need to become your care-giver. You are big enough, well physically at least, to keep your things neatly concentrated in one place. Make your bed. I’d be happier if you share in some minor chores. Plus this is also a means for us to spend some nice quality time together which is the whole point of your visit, no? You want to have fried calamari with romesco as appetizer, lamb koftas, zesty couscous and mixed vegetables salad as your main, and mud pie with ice-cream for dessert tonight? Simply press that button and hey presto! You automatically have this feast to devour in front of you. Quite easy, nah? Jackass! Lend me a helping hand, for God’s sake.

  • 5th Rule: Do not be cheapy

You do not need to be an Economics or Finance guru to understand that today we live in an expensive world. Volunteer to pay for a meal sometimes. Chances are I won’t let you but the gesture will be enormously appreciated. Offer a small prezzie or at the very least, say a grateful ‘thank you’ when you go.

  • 6th Rule: Ban technology

“I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.” – Albert Einstein. Isn’t this downright accurate? Well, kudos Albert! We’ve reached this very epoch. Actually, I am a little confused as to why you would come at my place to stay and socialise with me, but proceed to stare into the screen of your phone every ten minutes. Anti-social much? Please, as tempting as it might be, do not be too focused on instagramming, facebooking, vining or snapchatting every single activity you are doing, hashtagged #familytime or #whatever #bullshit. It breaks the real human face-to-face connection. And do I need to say that it is plain rude? You do that? Take your baggage and off my planet, zombie!

  • 7th rule: Do not judge

Some visitors deserve an Olympic Gold Medal for ‘jumping to conclusions’ when they come at your place. They really need to remove that stick from their butts which compels them to be either demanding, finicky or judgemental. “Why did you do this? Why did you do that? No, this is not how it’s supposed to be done…and bla bla bla”. To tell you the truth my dear, I like your approach. Now let’s see your departure. Waster!

To sum it up, what is acceptable and appropriate varies from family to family but the basic concept seems to hold true in every household. Guest etiquette is definitely not a holier-than-thou rulebook that exists to make people feel bad or unwanted. On the contrary, these codes of conduct are simple tools and tips to make you feel more welcomed, loved and comfortable. Trust me, as long as you genuinely care, you’d do just fine as an ideal guest!

(Image borrowed from Google)

Solitude

“There are two types of solitude-one that pulls you into darkness and another one that pushes you towards light. While the former drowns a person in the tangled inferno of harrowing isolation, bottomless depression and lugubrious despondency; the latter transforms him to a fireball of energy when he is fully connected to his own being, thereby allowing the individual to get a glimpse of quintessential empyrean.”

-The Little Mermaid, MMXVI

International Women’s Day

Hello gorgeous bloggers, 

Today is International Women’s Day and I would like to seize this opportunity to shed some light on a few pressing issues surrounding women. To begin with, what is a ‘woman’? How do we define a ‘woman’? The dictionary would eruditely explain us that a woman is a female human being. Oh, did I hear it right? Yes. A human being. Not a piece of flesh. If truth be told, a woman is worth more than a slice of ham and two lumps of fat on her chest. And I’m sorry to say that she is not a baby-producing machine either. She is a human being. She has a mind of her own. She has desires. She has aspirations and goals. She wants to be accepted-not because of her big eyes or large hips, but because of her thoughts, her energy and her abilities. Everyone, in developed countries and developing ones alike, is talking about women’s empowerment, women’s emancipation and gender equality. They are beautiful words that sound good to the ears. I don’t deny it. Indeed, they look good on paper as well; and I swear it will fetch you a couple of marks if you mention them somewhere in exams. But do we actually walk the talk? Are our women really liberated at home? Do they enjoy equal rights at their workplace? For all the optimistic person that I am, I don’t think so. 

Women are still shamed and criticized in this 21st century. They are still perceived to be the weaker sex in society. Their potential is still oppressed by bogus traditions and spurious beliefs. They are still seen as sexual objects. You don’t believe it? Let me give you a couple of eye-opening examples. Just flip through a fashion magazine, turn on the television or listen to the lyrics of popular songs and unfortunately, you will quickly find a common theme: the sexualisation of women. In advertisements, the exposure of women’s bodies occurs about four times as often compared to men’s bodies. The term “sex sells” has begun to cross the boundaries to where we are witnessing sex influence on every product that we are purchasing from alcohol, beauty supplies, groceries to even banking services. Have you ever wondered what correlation, if any, there is between a banking product and a woman’s body? Does that make sense to you? For me, it does not. 

Wait. It does not end here. In many parts of the world, women are traded most commonly for the purpose of sexual slavery and forced labour. As disgusting as it seems, in many Islamic States, captured women are sold in slave markets and at auctions. Are women just a dime’s worth? Not to mention, at work, they rarely escape from the dirty, lustful gaze of their superiors who trick those poor souls into sleeping with them for promotions and career advancement options. Everywhere, practically everywhere, women’s bodies are designated as property that can be evaluated, looked at and touched at the impulse of men’s desire. On top of that, if current trend continues, almost 16 million girls worldwide between the ages 6 and 11 will never get access to primary school education compared to just about 8 million boys. And don’t even get me started on the pay difference that exists. Why? Isn’t it high time this sickening, unjustifiable merry-go-round stop? 

Do you know what makes a woman feel unshackled? Do you wish to participate in women’s salvation? 

Then…

Give her. For once give her.
Give her a platform and watch how she dances off her feet. 
Give her wings and see how she soars higher for the sky offbeat.
Give her a pen and marvel at how she travels in time.
Give her a voice and see how she tolerates no crime.

Judge her. By all means judge her. 
Judge her by her courage
not by the depth of her cleavage.
Judge her by her morals unhurt
not by the length of her skirt.
Judge her from within
not by the colour of her skin.

Let her be. 
Let her be free expressing her emotions, needs and wants.
Let her be free choosing her path, away from religious dogmas and society’s taunts.
Let her live her life in a manner she hopes for.
Let her breathe even if she is a whore.

And! She is sexy. Yes! I’m telling you!           
She is sexy in the way she stands on her own feet independently.   
She is sexy in the way she brings up her child single-handedly.
She is sexy in the way she carries herself with dignity.
She is sexy in the way she sticks to her principles composedly.
Doesn’t this make her one hell of a sexy woman?

Please ladies, you have an identity. You do not need someone else to validate your existence. Do not let yourself be looked down. Forget the rules. You, as a single woman, are worth the entire world’s fortune. No one is rich enough to buy you. No one is strong enough to abuse you. No one is lily-white enough to slam you. Women’s empowerment starts with you. It is when you empower yourself, when you embrace yourself-with all your flaws, your valour, your beauty and your femininity. 

Happy International Women’s Day 2016!